Intervened Hoarder

I am a hoarder. I’d like to believe that everything has meaning so everything holds importance to me. With each and every interaction or life experience there is a memory. And at the end of it all memories is all you have left. So I hold on to everything remembering the moments that meant so much to me. The events that left an imprint in my soul. The objects involved are like artifacts that trigger a specific memory. Objects just take up space. But then there are others that are much worse.

   I hoard people too. I hang on to people that at some point or time had significance in my life. They've helped shape me, taught me, exposed me to new things. Even those that have wronged me I've still manage to hang on.  But hoarding people is a lot of work, you see, they don’t just take space, they take effort & time. They take an emotional toll.

Intervention time has come and I now see my self-inflicted pain. Though they've helped me change, it is because of that very change that they may no longer need to play a role in my life. Sometimes it is that very change that has split us apart. It isn't everyone some people can adjust and handle the change but others just don’t treat me the same. I try to rationalize my grasp of them by weighing our shared history instead of the current role they’re playing. Always initiating while they're never reciprocating. Doubting the value of our relationship. I find myself drowning. No more suffocating. Time to do some social cleansing.